Wrestling Milestones. November 17th - November 23rd

11/18/1963 - Born - Brian Steele
11/18/1975 - Born - Taiyo Kea
11/18/1978 - Died - Eric the Red Hansen in a motor vehicle accident at 34
11/19/1971 - Born - Vince Austin
11/20/1997 - Died - Stanley Blackburn at 80
11/21/1964 - Born - Shane Douglas
11/21/1967 - Born - Chris Beniot
11/21/1969 - Born - Dynamite D
11/21/1970 - Born - "The Modern Day Cowboy" Chris Anthony
11/22/1954 - Died - Promoter Jess (Roderick) McMahon at 72
11/22/1967 - Born - Ron Powers
11/22/1970 - Born - Damien Storm
11/22/1976 - Born - Lash LaRoux
11/22/1978 - Born - Stevie Phillips
11/22/2000 - Died - Yoshihiro Momota at 54
11/22/2002 - Died - Billy Joe Travis of a heart attack
11/23/1994 - Died - Art Barr at 28 of drug related causes

This Week in Professional Wrestling History. November 17th - November 23rd

11/17/1994 - The Rat Pack won a one-night tournament for the SCW Tag Team title
11/17/1996 - Event - Survivor Series, Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
11/17/1996 - Psycho Sid defeated Shawn Michaels for the WWF Heavyweight title
11/17/1997 - Iceman Chris Cannon stripped of the SCW Light Heavyweight title
11/17/1998 - Duane Gill (Gillberg) defeated Christian Cage for the WWF Light Heavyweight title
11/17/2000 - The Hit Squad defeated Don Montoya & Homicide for the Jersey All Pro Tag Team Titles
11/17/2002 - Event - Survivor Series, Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
11/17/2002 - The Big Show defeated Brock Lesnar for the WWE Smackdown Heavyweight title
11/17/2002 - Shawn Michaels defeated Triple H, Kane, Chris Jericho, Booker T, and Rob Van Dam for the WWE Raw World title
11/17/2002 - Eddie & Chavo Guerrero defeated Edge & Rey Misterio, Jr. and Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit for the WWE Smackdown Tag Team title
11/17/2002 - Victoria defeated Trish Stratus for the WWE Women's title
11/17/2002 - Billy Kidman defeated Jamie Noble for the WWE Cruiserweight title
11/18/1938 - Jim Londos defeated Bronco Nagurski for the World Heavyweight title
11/18/1983 - Ted DiBiase defeated Brett Wayne for the Georgia National Heavyweight title
11/18/1992 - Event - Clash of the Champions XXI
11/18/1992 - Shane Douglas & Rick Steamboat defeated Dustin Rhodes & Barry Windham for the WCW World Tag Team title
11/18/1995 - Event - November to Remember, ECW Arena Philadelphia, PA
11/18/1996 - Brian Christopher defeated Macho Warrior Ric Hogan for the USWA Southern Heavyweight title
11/18/2000 - Homicide defeated Jay Lover for the vacant Jersey All Pro Heavyweight Title
11/18/2000 - Nick Berk defeated Trent Acid & Ric Blade to win the vacant for the Jersey All Pro Light-Heavyweight Title
11/18/2000 - Skinhead Ivan defeated Dr. Hurtz for the New Jersey State Title
11/18/2001 - Event - Survivor Series, Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro,NC
11/18/2001 - Edge defeated Test for the WWF Intercontinental title
11/18/2001 - Edge unified the WWF Intercontinental and WCW US Heavyweight titles
11/18/2001 - The Dudley Boyz defeated The Hardy Boyz for the WWF Tag Team title
11/18/2001 - The Dudley Boyz unified the WWF and WCW Tag Team titles
11/18/2001 - Trish Stratus defeated Ivory, Lita, Jazz, Molly and Jacqueline in a 6 Way Match for the vacant WWF Women's title
11/19/1960 - Johnny Valentine & Buddy Rogers defeated Al Costello & Roy Heffernan for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/19/1989 - Bill Dundee defeated Tony Anthony for the USWA Southern Heavyweight title
11/19/1990 - Curt Hennig defeated Kerry Von Erich for the WWF Intercontinental title
11/19/1991 - Event - Clash of the Champions XVII
11/19/1991 - Rick Rude defeated Sting for the WCW U.S. Heavyweight title
11/19/1991 - Dustin Rhodes & Rick Steamboat defeated Arn Anderson & Larry Zbyszko for the WCW World Tag Team title
11/19/1994 - Event - November to Remember, ECW Arena Philadelphia, PA
11/19/1994 - Chrs Candido defeated Tracy Smothers in a tournament final for the NWA Heavyweight title
11/19/1995 - Event - Survivor Series, US Air Arena, Landover, MD
11/19/1995 - Bret Hart defeated Diesel for the WWF Heavyweight title
11/19/2000 - Event - Survivor Series, Ice Palace, Tampa, FL
11/20/1990 - Event - Clash of the Champions XIII
11/20/1999 - John Zandig defeated Wife Beater for the Combat Zone World Heavyweight Title
11/20/1999 - Justice Pain defeated The Thrill Kill Kult in a handicap match for the vacant Combat Zone Wrestling Tag Team Titles
11/20/2000 - Chuck Palumbo & Sean Stasiak defeated Elis Skipper (substituting for an injured Disco) & Alex Wright for the WCW Tag Team title
11/20/2000 - Nate Hatred defeated Wife Beater for the Combat Zone World Ironman Title
11/20/2002 - JeffJarrett defeated Ron Killings for the NWA Heavyweight title
11/21/1978 - Tony Garea & Larry Zbyszko defeated The Yukon Lumberjacks for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/21/1980 - Ted DiBiase defeated Ken Patera for the Missouri State Heavyweight title
11/21/1999 - Event - Mayhem, Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Canada
11/21/1999 - Breat Hart defeated Chris Benoit in a tournament final for the WCW Heavyweight title
11/21/1999 - Evan Karagias defeated Disco Inferno for the WCW Cruiserweight title
11/21/2000 - Billy Gunn defeated Eddie Guerrero for the WWF Intercontinental title
11/22/1990 - Event - Survivor Series, Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, CT
11/22/1992 - Jeff Jarrett won a Battle Royal for the USWA Unified Heavyweight title
11/22/1993 - Buddy Landell defeated Jeff Jarrett for the USWA Southern Heavyweight title
11/22/1997 - Cueball Carmichael & C.W. Anderson defeated Death & Destruction for the SCW Tag Team title
11/22/1997 - Boris Dragoff defeated K.C. Thunder for the SCW North Carolina Heavyweight title
11/22/1997 - Joey Matthews defeated The Intruder for the SCW Light Heavyweight title
11/22/1998 - Event - World War III, The Palace, Auburn Hills, MI
11/22/1998 - Billy Kidman defeated Juventud Guerrera for the WCW Cruiserweight title
11/22/1999 - Creative control defeated Kidman & Konnan for the WCW Tag Team title
11/22/2000 - Scott Hall was arrested for traffic infractions following a two-car accident and found to be legally intoxicated
11/22/2002 - Sabu defeated The Sandman in a TLC Match for the vacant USA Pro-Wrestling Heavyweight Title
11/22/2002 - Wayne & The Trekkie defeated The Boogie Knights for the USA Pro-Wrestling Tag Team Titles
11/22/2002 - The Amazing Red defeated Quiet Storm, Deranged, & Reefer for the vacant USA Pro-Wrestling U.S. Heavyweight Title
11/22/2002 - Homicide defeated The Amazing Red for the USA Pro-Wrestling U.S. Heavyweight Title
11/22/2002 - Homicide defeated Xavier for the USA Pro-Wrestling X-Treme Title
11/23/1961 - Bob Geigel & Otto Von Krupp defeated Dale Lewis & Pat Kennedy for the AWA Tag Team title
11/23/1979 - Kevin Von Erich defeated Dick Murdoch for the Missouri State Heavyweight title
11/23/1981 - Pedro Morales defeated Magnificent Muraco for the WWWF Intercontinental title
11/23/1989 - Event - Survivor Series, Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, IL
11/23/1994 - Event - Survivor Series, Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, TX
11/23/1994 - Bob Backlund defeated Bret Hart for the WWF Heavyweight title
11/23/1994 - Shawn Michaels & Diesel split & abandoned the WWF Tag Team title
11/23/1995 - Brad Armstrong defeated Terry Gordy for the Smokey Mountain Heavyweight title
11/23/1996 - Justin St. John & Steve Flynn defeated Dan Cooley & Scott Sterling for the SSW Tag Team title
11/23/1996 - Gorgeous George III defeated Chris Stephenson for the SCW Heavweight title
11/23/1996 - Steven Dunn & Flash Flanagan defeated the Bruise Brothers for the USWA Tag Team title
11/23/1997 - Event - World War III, Palace, Auburn Hills, MI
11/23/1997 - Rip Rogers defeated Bill Dundee for the Ohio Valley Heavyweight title

Look out! The marching band has escaped onto the field!

Ah, yes...the marching band takes the field. I was never a band geek in high school, more the writer type than anything else, but stories like this never fail to make me crack a smile. Down in San Antonio, Texas, the Churchill High marching band is under fire for the routine they have been performing as of late. The complaints started after the performance of their routine, "Symphonic Schizophrenia," at the recent University Interscholastic League state band competition, where it placed eighth out of thirty, by the way. The routine featured fake padded walls and some band members in strait jackets rambling around the field erratically.

Despite the fact this routine had been performed several times by the band at their schools' football games, the first complaints came after the state competition. I guess it would be kind of irritating for the kids at Dallas School for the Criminally Insane, you know, the only school in the Lone Star State with multiple personalities.

Ed Dickey, head of the local chapter of the National Alliance on Mental Illness said that he had received several calls from people upset over the performance, and that Churchill's band lacked sensitivity and were trivializing mental illness, adding "This is ignorance." Damn, and to think of all the times I have used the phrase "batshit crazy" in blog posts or on my radio show. What a shot to my ego, finding out a high school marching band has less sensitivity than I do.

Aw, come on Ed...how many other examples of insensitivity toward mental illness are out there, and you want to pick on a high school band? Have you had a sit-down with the composer of the piece they were performing, from which the band chose its theme? No, probably not. I'm just saying is all. Besides that, you have to give that band a hand for creativity. Honestly, you show me the kid who can play a trombone while in a strait jacket, and then tell me they only got eighth place. What the hell did the winning school do, freakin' levitate?

"We're taking a step back and looking at what we do here, and we're going to make some changes.""We don't want this to happen again," according to Laura Calderon, a yeshole for the Northeast Independent School District. "We don't want this to happen again." Calderon added that NISD will add an additional layer of review before allowing student to perform potentially controversial routines.

Some people may chalk this up to simple political correctness, but think about this story the next time you twirl your finger around your temple, or better yet, next time you have the urge to tell the cashier that the gas prices are crazy, keep it to yourself. While it's a perfectly valid opinion, you never know what crusade lurks around the corner.

Capitulation at its finest, people...

The more it changes...in an announcement yesterday, our intrepid HomeSec said it will go ahead with a new policy to crackdown on the hiring of illegal immigrants, only not so much. When the new policy goes into effect on January 15, instead of targeting companies with federal contracts as low as $3000, now the limit applies only to those contractors with deals over $100,000, and employers are now only required to check the work documents of those employees working on those specific projects. Yeah, I really feel as though the issue is being addressed now.

The changes would apply to solicitations or awards made after Jan. 15, and exempt workers who have already received security clearances, contracts for commercial, off-the-shelf items, and contracts lasting less than 120 days. Oh...well then. Why is it so hard for businesses in this country to accept that they have to check the ID of their employees before they hire them, and particularly if they are working on government contracts? I have never held a job where I didn't have to verify my legal status to work in the United States. It's common damn practice, not thumbscrews being tightened by an unreasonable government, and believe you me, folks, this is an administration that knows unreasonable.

Randel K. Johnson, vice president and yeshole for the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, said the administration "had been responsive to a substantial amount of business concerns," particularly by limiting the rule to large contractors, to new contracts and to workers on those contracts. That's cute, Mr. Johnson, as there is a world of difference between being responsive and fumbling for zippers in the dark over promises in your ear. To translate that, it sounds like the current administration either bent over and took it, or got some bruised knees in the process, cause businesses in this country got their way, and seemingly had their way with this new policy.

E-Verify, a system with which companies can check federal Social Security and immigration databases to determine whether an employee is authorized to work, only covers only 1 percent of an estimated 6 million U.S. employers and about 11 percent of annual hiring, at the present. Kind of makes you want to facepalm yourself, doesn't it? According to claims by the United States Chamber of Commerce, the implementation of the system would cost $10 billion. For something that companies and employers are already required to do? How in the fuck does that math add up?

The final nonsense in this isn't even the businesses that are wanting to buck the system, but rather the Department of Homeland Security. Even after all of this, federal officials predict the initiative will eventually cover more than 20 percent of U.S. hiring, DHS yeshole Laura Keehner said.

That's it? 20 fucking percent? That's our Department of Homeland Security for ya, doing a heckuva job since day one.

Probably Uncalled For Episode 74 recap

Man, had bad does your particular deity of choice have to have it in for you to kill you by slamming your newly deceased spouse's casket into the back of your head after a traffic accident? Not to mention, while I'm sure there are at least one or two funeral procession jokes out there, my original thought was how bad is the traffic situation in Brazil for something like this to happen? I mean, other third world toilets I can easily imagine this kind of stuff happening, cause you'd have to be half-suicidal to get in a taxi, let alone a hearse for a procession. However you want to look at it, there must have been some kind of karma involved, and apparently it was NOT the karma to fuck with...

...as much as I enjoy professional wrestling, and experience as a promoter aside, even I couldn't truck with the concept of bringing in Sarah Palin for an appearance at a pay-per-view, as TNA Wrestling is proposing for their Dec. 7 Final Resolution event in Orlando, Florida. I'm not disagreeing with the idea of donating $50,000 to charity as part of the deal, and I can't disagree entirely with TNA President Dixie Carter's reasoning behind it, how much more Sarah Palin are we going to be inflicted with? She is officially yesterday's news. Her ticket lost the election, and all she should have to look forward to is going back to Alaska and running that damn state. Enough with the Fox News, CNN, and the like. The ethics system in Alaska, by her design, let her off the hook for her ethics violations, and we all know that not damn thing one will be done over her wardrobe antics on the vice-presidential campaign trail, so can we all at least agree that fading back into the woodwork is the best fucking place for the original desperate housewife to go?...

...regarding the woman in Washington, suing a dentist who botched her breast reduction, why don't you smack your parents for not knowing any better than to take you to a dentist for a boob job, smack your damn self for not knowing any better not to question why you were at a dentist's office for a boob job, and then, in addition to filing suit against the so-called doctor, you need to file suit against the state medical and dental boards in Washington, because if this is the best two state boards can do in the service of protecting the public, then they should damn sure be held just as accountable for letting asshole wanna-be plastic surgeon Thomas Laney get away with his shit for so long...

...if you need any further proof that crime does not pay, just do the math. Stealing an $11 dollar hammer to steal a $9 bottle of wine? I was sad when I lost my train of thought, and then I read of the man who apparently could not think at all. This guy needed an IQ bailout...

...in a final note, I had become rather comfortable with our "Stupid Britain" segment, which has evolved from the occasional odd story about offbeat shit from the United Kingdom, notably Great Britain. From dumbass behavior to even more dumbass governing, the stories eventually became a regular segment. While it may appear otherwise, I really do respect the UK and their rich heritage and history, but seriously, when even the term "british" has been deemed offensive, we may have to actually change the name of the segment to "Stupidity in the UK" or something more inclusive, as God knows we don't want to hurt any feelings over here...you can't see it, but I'm rolling my eyes on that one...

Thanks to everyone for checking out the show this week, including The Debi Daly Show, whose host joined us in the chat room tonight, and we hope to see you back again next week for Probably Uncalled For, "Why Talk Radio Was Invented!"

In just one hour on an all-new Probably Uncalled For...

Join us tonight for another all-new episode of the award-nominated talk radio juggernaut! Tonight, we'll be discussing how you can tell you live in a bitter red state, more great moments in inebriation, an utterly epic "Stupid Britain" segment, how to tell you picked the wrong plastic surgeon, another potential TV exclusive for Sarah Palin, and the usual gaggle of topics TBA

Tonight on an all new Inside the Squared Circle

Inside the Squared Circle for Monday night November 10th, 2008
I will be discussing TNA Turning Point PPV Results, TNA beats ECW and more WWE Superstars go bye bye.
Plus Wrestling Tidbits, Weird News and My Question of the Week!
All this and more coming up on the show.
www.blogtalkradio.com/insidethesquaredcircle
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Wrestling Milestones. November 10th - November 16th

11/10/1950 - Born - "Cowboy" Bob Orton Jr.
11/10/1964 - Born - Jushin "Thunder" Liger (Keiichi Yamada)
11/10/1966 - Born - Bill DeMott AKA Hugh Morris
11/10/1991 - Died - Dick the Bruiser of internal bleeding at 62
11/11/1964 - Born - Billy Gunn
11/11/1975 - Born - Rory Fox
11/11/1976 - Born - Jay Jalliet
11/12/1949 - Born - Jerry the King Lawler
11/12/1968 - Born - Disco Inferno
11/12/1980 - Born - Trent Acid
11/13/1966 - Born - Mike Anthony
11/13/1993 - Died - Rufus R. Jones of a heart attack at 60
11/13/1999 - Died - Tony Rumble of a heart attack at 43
11/14/1972 - Born - A-Train
11/15/1952 - Born - "Macho Man" Randy Savage (Randy Poffo)
11/15/1967 - Born - Michiyashi O'Haire
11/16/1962 - Born - Rick Deezel

This Week in Professional Wrestling History. November 10th - November 16th

11/10/1967 - Pat O'Conner & Wilbur Snyder defeated Harley Race & Chris Markoff for the AWA Tag Team title
11/10/1993 - Event - Clash of the Champions XXV
11/10/1997 - Eddy Guerrero defeated Rey Misterio, Jr. for the WCW Cruiserweight title
11/10/1999 - Rico Constantino defeated Rob Conway for the Ohio Valley Heavyweight title
11/10/2000 - Lance Storm defeated Gen. Rection for the WCW US Heavyweight title
11/11/1965 - Mad Dog Vachon defeated the Crusher for the AWA Heavyweight title
11/12/1994 - Colorado Kid defeated Kit Carson for the Music City North American Heavyweight Title
11/12/2001 - The Hardy Boyz defeated Booker T & Test for the WWF Tag Team title
11/12/2001 - Edge defeated Kurt Angle for the WCW U.S. Heavyweight title
11/13/1992 - The Rock n' Roll Express defeated the Heavenly Bodies for the Smokey Mountain Tag Team title
11/13/1993 - Sabu defeated Terry Funk for the ECW Television title
11/13/1993 - Tommy Dreamer & Johnny Gunn defeated Tony Stetson & Johnny Hot Body for the ECW Tag Team title
11/13/1995 - Kensuke Sasaki defeated Sting for the WCW U.S. Heavyweight title
11/13/1993 - Event - November to Remember, ECW Arena Philadelphia, PA
11/13/1999 - Masato Tanaka defeated Kodo Fuyuki for the World Entertainment Wrestling Heavyweight title
11/13/2002 - Brian Lee & Slash defeated Chris Harris & James Storm for the NWa Tag Team title
11/13/2002 - The Hussla defeated Rory Fox for the Heartland Wrestling Association Cruiserweight Title
11/14/1957 - Dick Hutton defeated Lou Thesz for the NWA Heavyweight Wrestling title
11/14/1963 - Killer Kowalski & Gorilla Monsoon defeated Skull Murphy & Brute Bernard for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/14/1973 - Dean Ho & Tony Garea defeated Professor Tanaka & Mr. Fuji for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/14/1997 - Brooklyn Bad Boy #1 defeated Danny Christian for the SSW Appalachian title
11/14/1999 - Event - Survivor Series, Joe Louis Arena, Detroit MI
11/14/1999 - The Big Show defeated Triple-H for the WWF Heavyweight title
11/14/2000 - Sabu defeated Mike Rapada (Colorado Kid) for the NWA Heavyweight title
11/15/1983 - Tony Atlas & Rocky Johnson defeated the Samoans for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/15/1998 - Event - Survivor Series, Kiel Center, St. Louis, MO
11/15/1998 - Rocky Maivia defeated Mankind in a tournament final for the WWF World Heavyweight title
11/15/1998 - Sable defeated Jacquelyn for the WWF Women's title
11/15/2000 - Chris Michaels defeated The Masked Maniac for the USA Pro-Wrestling U.S. Heavyweight Title
11/16/1961 - Dale Lewis & Pat Kennedy defeated Hardboiled Haggerty & Bob Geigel for the AWA Tag Team title
11/16/1984 - Crusher Blackwell defeated Harley Race for the Missouri State Heavyweight title
11/16/1992 - The Sandman defeated Don Muraco for the ECW Heavyweight title
11/16/1994 - Event - Clash of the Champions XXIX
11/16/1994 - The Patriot & Marcus Bagwell defeated Paul Orndorff & Paul Roma for the WCW World Tag Team title
11/16/1996 - Event - November to Remember, ECW Arena Philadelphia, PA
11/16/1996 - Jerry Lawler defeated Colorado Kid for the USWA Unified Heavyweight title
11/16/1998 - Juventud Guerrera defeated Billy Kidman for the WCW Cruiserweight title
11/16/2000 - Disqo & Alex Wright defeated Mark Jindrak & Sean O'Haire for the WCW Tag Team title
11/16/2000 - Vince McMahon hired Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura as color man for the XFL broadcast team

Your weekend in entertainment news: Could someone please repo Paris Hilton's SAG card?

Pop singer Pink, whose music I sort of consider a guilty pleasure, passed along the details of an alleged argument she had with alleged musician John Mayer recently, after the douchebag reportedly made the comment that he "only shags really stupid women." Really? Good fucking thing I had not previously confused Jessica Simpson and Cameron Diaz as intellectual beacons in the entertainment industry. And honestly..."shag?" I know Mayer's an insufferable schmuck and all, but don't you think one of the fabulous people he bends over a couch somewhere would bother telling him the whole "Austin Powers" thing has faded from the pop culture jargon here in the past few years? Seriously, can't this idiot die in a plane crash, or a drug overdose, or from rough sex gone bad in some hotel room with a flock of third world hustlers?

In her recent interview with Britain's The Sun, Pink went on to say she "doesn't believe him as much as he believes him." Not only is that fairly amusing, but pretty on the mark, given Mayer's reputation for having a much, read MUCH, higher opinion of himself than really anybody on the planet, other than his gaggle of douchebag fans. Only Dane Cook baffles me more for being famous with little to no discernible talent whatsoever. Then again, in fairness to Mayer, at least he writes his own material, which is more than I can say for a good portion of Cook's alleged stand-up routine.

But what I would like to know, is how is Jennifer Aniston handling her new-found, and as rumored, recently regained status as one of the "really stupid women?" Guess we'll find out whenever a sex tape surfaces...

...Meanwhile, as Pink was dragging John Mayer's dumb ass through the mud for his supposed fuckery, Tara Reid reared her ugly from the neck down, commenting that she would never do Playboy, in an interview with People magazine. Has People run out of shit to write about? What in the name of holy damn is Tara Reid doing these days that would interest anybody, let alone the readers of People, despite the fact the readers of People would be fascinated by the bowel movement trends of celebrities even further down on the food chain that Tara Reid?

Reid, in the course of her interview, told the magazine that the only person who sees her naked is her boyfriend, who "thinks I'm sexy, and that's all I care about." Isn't that fucking special? The D-list celebrities always get the sweetest boyfriends, don't they? She'd better hope the royalties don't dry up anytime soon. I'm just saying. Not to mention, how is it that the people who have legitimately NO shot at gracing the pages of Playboy, unless fully clothed,are the first to insist they would NEVER pose for the legendary periodical? Last time I heard, and in the interest of full disclosure, I am a Playboy subscriber, they were most assuredly NOT interested in having her mangled ass do a spread. I would even be so bold as to suggest that even Penthouse and Hustler would not consider it, not even for a split second.

Go have another cocktail, hang out with that boyfriend who must dig you a lot more with the lights off, and leave the interviews off your list. I'm glad you know there are problems with your stomach. We're ALL glad you know that, cause quite frankly, we're tired as fuck of hearing about it, and especially seeing it. For someone who has a problem with the way her stomach looks, don't you think you could find a shirt that doesn't quite draw attention to your B-grade plastic surgery mishaps, which you call your "battle wounds." "Battle wounds?" Maybe that's what caused the problem. What the fuck, did you pick a fight with the plastic surgeon in the middle of the fucking procedure? Fucking dolt...

...Yeah, I hear ya. It has been a bit since I had anything nasty to write about busted-ass skidro Paris Hilton. Been a busy time for me, what with the election and everything. But rest soundly, my faithful readers...America's favorite cockstainer is back...AND WITH A NEW MOVIE!!! I'm sure you have been anticipating this as much as I have, if only to rip her on it, cause you know I have absolutely NO interest whatsoever in seeing it. More disclosure here, people: I have only sat through one Paris Hilton movie in its entirety, and that was House of Wax. Yes, to answer your first question, I do still feel it when it comes onto rain. To answer your second question, yes, I have seen parts of One Night in Paris, and no, I have not seen the infamous sex tape all the way through. I saw just enough, through web clips, to show that only with Paris Hilton could one become famous with a sex tape, and not even look like she knows how to suck a dick. Only in America, and only with Paris Hilton.

But now she's supposedly a singer, and an actress, and with Repo! The Genetic Opera, which opened this last Friday, now being inflicted upon unsuspecting theatergoers, the legacy continues. Early reviews are in, and unsurprisingly, they are less than kind. Why then, I wonder, do studios keep giving her a shot? Doesn't Repo! now hit the list as the second, third, or maybe even fourth movie Hilton has done that has been described as "easily one of the worst movies of the year, if not all time?" God knows I was just as curious as you were, so it was off to IMDB.com, which not only lists Hilton's other infamous movie from this year, The Hottie and the Nottie as the #15 worst movie of all-time (it was previously gracing the #1 spot until Disaster Movie came along) and her 2006 celluloid abortion Pledge This! (also known as National Lampoon's Pledge This!), which is currently listed as the 9th worst movie of all-time, but also her flick The Hillz (2004), which is currently racking up 24th worst movie honors. Three and now possibly a fourth mishap residing in the Bottom 100 movies of all-time? What a resume. We're talking about stuff ranked below Manos: The Hands of Fate, Glitter, Gigli, and even From Justin to Kelly. From Justin to Kelly, for fuck's sake!

I would say this is what the studios get for involving someone who wasn't even very convincing as an accidental porn actress, but then again, I'm not saying anything you don't already know. To further complicate matters, it seems as though the only reason she was in the movie was to piggyback it to notice, if not fame. LA Times critic Mark Olsen noted this, as he writes Hilton is "never glimpsed in anything but brief, fleeting shots and her hoarse bark of a singing voice is used as little as possible."

I, for one, will not lose any sleep over missing the experience of witnessing this steamer, in theaters, on DVD, or even on an airplane. Sometimes, there's a lot to be said for not liking to fly. That said, I'd rather be in a 747 plummeting to earth than waste a minute, a second, a dollar, or a dime on a Paris Hilton project.

Mississippi Burning II: Dumbass Boogaloo

What an absolute shock this story was when I found it. Not even a week after the presidential election, and already, the red states are showing their asses in small, yet remarkably unrefined ways. WLBT TV reports on officials at Puckett Attendance Center telling a woman's daughters that they were only allowed to mention President-elect Barack Obama in history class. Not in any other class, nor in the hallways, but only in history class. No word on whether or not this mysterious decision applies to the cafeteria, the buses, or the parking lot. Only in red state Mississippi, where yes, they did go for Sen. John McCain, could politics collide with limericks in just this fashion:

"There once was a school in Puckett,
that didn't like the election and said fuck it..."

I'm not exactly a poet laureate, so I'll allow you to finish it, if you can. Hell, email me your best shot, and I'll reprint it here.

Naturally, when the girls' mother called the school, rightfully so, with a little "what the hell?," no explanation was given, nor was any school official ready to speak with WLBT when they called for some answers. Personally, I don't think any explanation is needed. Mississippi is a state full of hicks, always has been, always will be, and you'd be hard pressed to argue, based on the actions of the apparently bitter muckety mucks at the Puckett Attendance Center.

Now the questions begin

Well, I guess I put it off long enough. Then again, with scores of other writers and journalists weighing in on Tuesday's historic elections in today's Sunday newspapers, it's not like I'm waiting until February to really get started on dissecting Sen. Barack Obama's rise to become the President-elect of the United States.

It's fairly obvious to see how Obama won this election. Organization, fund-raising, staying on message, and avoiding the destructive attack tone of campaigning were points of order the Obama team clearly understood better than the slipshod McCain team. From the selection of an utterly unqualified and borderline incompetent running mate, to a stubborn insistence on attacking personal associations that McCain himself was just as close to, the Republicans could not have done a better job of laying down in the road as rush hour was beginning. The party's collapse into chaos has been striking, and more than a little fun to watch, as I haven't seen this much feeding upon itself than the time the four cannibals got caught at a REALLY long red light. If Sarah Palin is really being touted as the new face of the GOP, expect a lot more of the same four years from now. Whackjob, which is closer than most people understand, was more generous than I would have been, and is a lot more generous than I have, in fact been.

As for our new President-elect, the critics, bloggers, and journalists have been quick to start questioning whether or not change is really coming. Come on, people...it took a grand total of three days for me to see a commercial touting a Barack Obama commemorative coin. Made me wonder how many John McCain coins that company had to melt down on Wednesday morning, and how appropriate a term is melt down, considering how the last five or six weeks of the McCain-Palin, or Palin-Voices in her head campaigns went.

Granted, I can admit to a little skepticism. Some of the financial all-star team advising Obama throughout the campaign were already more than a little suspect, given their past roles in the deregulation of the financial industries that played a large part in getting us to the state we're in now. Paul Volcker? Robert Rubin? Larry freakin' Summers? I cannot argue against bringing in people with experience, but sometimes you simply need to hire new guards to work the room, not the guys who helped case the joint in the first place.

Much was made of President-elect Obama's first press conference last week, in which there was some fluff material about the selection of the new dog (or dogs, possibly) for the Obama children, and a humorous moment when Obama made an offhand joke about the reputed fondness for seances by former first lady Nancy Reagan, which Obama later said he called and apologized for. Me personally, I would not have done that. Not that I am entirely an unapologetic person, but let's get serious people, seances? I notice none of them included getting in touch with her husband's mind, after it went off to the great unknown during his second term.

As the first full week of the Obama-elect era winds down, I do find it promising that his transition advisers have compiled a substantial list of Bush administration moves that could be reversed, overturned, or simply tossed on the leaf fire out back. Key on this list are matters involving climate change, stem cell research, and reproductive rights. While I'm sure the religious nutcake factions of the right-wing are wringing hands, gnashing and weeping, and maybe even going to the Florida extent of praying and fasting on courthouse steps (we all saw how well that worked for those nimrods, in their hopes of getting an abortion opponent in the White House), the crucial matter is climate change. Anything our next president does in that neighborhood should start with tackling a repeal of the Clear Skies Act, and working with Congress to overturn the rollbacks enacted on the Clean Air Act.

I congratulate our new President, and I sincerely wish him the best of luck in the pursuit of his agenda, as most anything would be an improvement on the last eight years, just so long as he doesn't allow the ghosts of administrations past to whisper too loudly in his ear. We the people apparently craved change, as evidenced by the vote (for the record, I voted for neither Obama or McCain), but the bottom line for your next four years will be how you tread the very fine line between change we can believe in and just more of the business-as-usual politics this country settled for throughout this decade.

The possibility of Bush being impeached? Yeah, you wanna buy a bridge with that?

Talk about blind faith. In the latest issue of The Nation, John Nichols writes of potential trouble in the wings for the (thankfully) soon-to-be former President George W. Bush. As is traditional, the outgoing President will be winging a few pardons here and there, and that's where the supposed trouble starts.

Mentioning constitutional framer George Mason's beliefs that impeachment would "surely" be in order if a president attempted to stop inquiry and prevent detection of wrongdoing within his administration, and that impeachment would be in order if a president were to pardon crimes which were advised by himself, Nichols writes of the obligation of the House Judiciary Committee to demand that Bush explain himself, should he pardon the usual cast of characters we have seen over the course of his eight years in the White House, such as Karl Rove, Harriet Miers, Josh Bolton, and on and on, etc.

Nichols concludes the blurb-style piece with the statement that the House should challenge any refusal of explanation by Bush of questionable pardons with articles of impeachment. Man, wouldn't that be a beautiful world, if only it would actually happen? Are we supposed to believe that even now, with a stronger Democratic majority in the House and Senate, that Dubya will ever be in the same room with a serious intent to bring about impeachment proceedings? For all the extra-constitutional hi jinx and flat-out lying us into a long and damaging war in Iraq, among items on a veritable laundry list of reasons why he should have already been impeached by now, do you honestly think now, in the final waning weeks of the Bush administration, this will be the thing that pushes the right button? Waiting until the turd turns white to remove it from the carpet hardly does anything to fix the stain underneath, nor does it do much to bolster one's reputation as a housekeeper. The boat done sailed, folks, and as usual, we're the ones left to tread the water in its wake.

Flat tires all around, and guess who's getting asked for a jack?

Well, I'm glad to see it's back to business as usual. Yesterday, the CEOs of General Motors, Ford, and Chrysler, along with the president of the United Auto Workers met with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid to hold hands out for even more federal aid. General Motors, in a statement, said the effort was to help "the competitive U.S. auto industry contribute to our nation's economic revival." How very. It seems in recent months, the only competition the auto industry has had is seeing who can rack up bigger volumes of unsold (read low mileage) vehicles, due to the industry's inability to develop anything other than massive pick-ups and sport utility vehicles.

In addition to help in getting their mitts on federal bailout monies from the Treasury Department or the Federal Reserve, the auto industry is wanting $25 billion in federal loans, so they can pay future health care costs for retirees. Perfect. The industry makes a deal with the unions just over a year ago, and now they can't figure out how to pay for it. According to Rep. John Dingell (D-MI), the automakers will use the money to "invest in jobs and opportunities for American workers and American industry." Again, how very. General Motors, in particular, is burning through a billion dollars a month, and all of a sudden, they want two years of blow-through cash to invest in jobs and opportunities? Then why, I need to know, are Ford and GM planning job cuts, if they are getting ready to invest in jobs? Are these the same jobs the UAW helps price workers out of in a matter of years? Will Ford, GM, and Chrysler continue to operate in the exact same fashion, on the taxpayers' dime, or will they actually invest in fuel-efficient technologies and production capabilities to prevent these vehicles from costing $30 grand a piece?

If the new, stronger Democratic Congress and Senate wants to help the auto industry, then what they should do is wait the 100 days that GM says is so critical for the auto industry, see who is still standing, and then for clearer ideas of how exactly the bailout cash will be used for good. The last thing the American people need is the loss of these auto jobs, I grant you, but at the same stroke, not if it means coughing up bonus money for the ineffectual chief executives that helped steer the industry into the less-than-stellar shape they're in? Then again, we are talking about Nancy Pelosi, who never met a problem she couldn't throw a blank check at, so Lord only knows...

Some stories should surprise me. This one, however, does not

Now that the excitement is ebbing a bit over Barack Obama's historic election to the Presidency of the United States on Tuesday, I'm glad to see a few people still managed to completely miss the fucking point entirely. In Chicago, where an estimated quarter of a million people at Grant Park celebrated Obama's victory over John McCain and some bitch from Alaska, several people were arrested for confusing the Windy City with Mexico, and firing guns to commemorate history in the making.

Celita Hart, a 19 year-old, thought it would be a brilliant political statement to leave a crowd of people chanting Obama's name, walk up to a police car, and bitchslap a male cop in the face. Hart had already been shouting "you white police can't do nothing" before slapping the police officer. Hart, who quickly found out the police, white or otherwise, can damn sure arrest your stupid ass for assaulting an officer, apparently could not get her head wrapped around the concept THE BLACK CANDIDATE WON! Regardless, that doesn't mean run wild in the fucking streets. It's not like either team from Chicago won the World Series or something. Even if Barack Obama was named the new police commissioner of the city of Chicago, that does not mean you can slap cops. Since you apparently learned nothing else from the experience, try to take that home with you...depending on how your bail hearing went. Hope you didn't think it'd be smart to take a swing at the judge while you were at it.

Elsewhere in the city, 24 year-old Kenneth Smith was arrested for firing three shots from a gun at his house, but took the time to complain the cops only arrested him "because a black man won for president." If that was how it really worked, do you honestly think there would even have been a black candidate? Get a grip moron, it's calling firing a gun in the fucking city limits, you stupid motherfucker.

Even money says neither of these fucking rocket surgeons even voted in the first place. Maybe these two idiots were the real reason Oprah and Jesse Jackson were crying during Obama's acceptance speech.

What part of body cavity search did you miss, dumbass?

The crackhead in question, pictured below, 38 year-old Evelyn Russo of Palm City, Florida, was arrested and charged after stealing two bucks in change from a car. While being booked, they found a glass crack pipe lodged between her ass cheeks, leading to an additional charge of introducing contraband into a detention facility. No word on whether or not charges are being considered for testing the limits of what latex gloves make it acceptable to touch.

Man, even with the grief I give police officers in my articles and posts from time to time for some of the stupid things they do, this is obviously one of those times when they are grossly underpaid, and judging from the picture, extra emphasis on grossly. Even for a crackhead, this dumbass is an embarrassment. It's 2008, lady...the law is well onto the tactic of hiding things in your ASS by now! Not to mention, after taking a look at you, and then this story, and then you again, I would dare venture the pipe was probably healthier before, when just used for inhaling crack, than it is now, after spending an exciting couple of hours crammed up your nasty ass. My advice would be to just go ahead and fucking hang yourself with jailhouse sheets, or your panties, should you even own any, or whatever you can get your hands on, because you obviously suck at life.

ppdingles thoughts on Election night 2008.

So the 2008 Presidential Election is over and history has been made as America(honestly for once)has voted in the first African-American President. But it wasn't such a smooth ride the entire night of November 4Th. Here is my take on some of the dumb things you might of missed that night.



The first had to be when Kentucky went red for McCain. You could have a talking turd with a Republican button on and Kentucky will vote for it. Oh wait they did that before...in 2000 and 2004.



Next is when I saw Louisiana go red for McCain. What the Hell? A history lesson for everyone down there. Lets go back to August 2005 and a little storm named Katrina. While all of you were sitting on your roofs waiting for help, President Bush was eating cake and guess who was eating with him?......John McCain! So next time a huge Hurricane comes your way I hope it wipes you all off the fucking map because your obviously to damn stupid for your own good!



Then there was the Gay-Marriage ban that was approved in California. Shame on anyone that voted for that!!!!! Nobody has the right to decide the life of other people. I just hope someday that the Gay community gets to vote on something that will restrict Straight people from doing something in their life. Turnabout is fair play to me.



And finally this happened the day after the election but it still garners attention. This is the Facebook group for supporters of Sarah Palin on Wednesday November 5Th, 2008



A little fuzzy but it says 364 "fewer" members! Already the rats are jumping ship. Her plane hasn't even touched down in Alaska and her "supporters" are already leaving town. No wonder they lost!

I'm ppdingles and I approve this blog posting!

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Wrestling Milestones. November 3rd - November 9th

11/03/1942 - Born - Pedro Morales
11/03/1969 - Born - Born Again Brawler
11/03/1970 - Born - Dawn Marie
11/03/2000 - Died - Cherie Dupree, valet to Georgeous George, at 73
11/04/1950 - Died - Danno O'Mahoney in an auto accident at 37
11/04/2001 - Died - Helen Hart of organ failure at 76
11/06/2003 - Died - Mike "Crash Holly" Lockwood at 32
11/07/1957 - Born - King Kong Bundy
11/07/1963 - Born - Damien Steele
11/07/1969 - Born - Takako Inoue of All Japan Women's Pro Wrestling in Ibaragi, Japan
11/07/1972 - Born - Kumiko Maekawa of All Japan Women's Pro Wrestling Chiba, Japan
11/08/1966 - Born - Gabe Casteel
11/08/1971 - Born - Bane
11/09/1945 - Born - "American Dream" Dusty Rhodes (Virgil Runnels)
11/09/1968 - Born - Kurt Angle
11/09/1970 - Born - Chris Jericho

This Week in Professional Wrestling History. November 3rd - November 9th

11/03/1939 - Steve Casey defeated Ed Don George for the AWA World Heavyweight title
11/03/1981 - The Spoiler defeated Charlie Cook for the Florida State Heavyweight title
11/03/1995 - Chris Stephenson defeated Boris Dragoff for the SCW Heavweight title
11/03/1997 - Perry Saturn defeated Disco Inferno for the WCW Television title
11/04/1980 - Dory Funk, Jr. defeated Dusty Rhodes for the Florida State Heavyweight title
11/04/1982 - Greg Valentine defeated Wahoo McDaniel for the NWA U.S. Heavyweight title
11/04/1991 - Tom Prichard defeated Eric Embry for the USWA Southern Heavyweight title
11/04/1991 - Doug Masters & Bart Sawyer defeated Jeff Jarrett & Robert Fuller for the USWA Tag Team title
11/04/1994 - 2 Cold Scorpio defeated Jason for the ECW Television title
11/04/1994 - Dean Melanko defeated 2 Cold Scorpio for the ECW Television title
11/04/2001 - Event - Rebellion, Manchester Evening News Arena, Manchester, England
11/04/2000 - Shark Boy defeated Rory Fox for the HWA Cruiserweight Title
11/05/1990 - Terry Funk defeated Jerry Lawler for the USWA Unified Heavyweight title
11/05/1994 - Public Enemy defeated Cactus Jack & Mikey Whipwreck for the ECW Tag Team title
11/05/2000 - Event - November to Remember, The Odeum, Villa Park, IL
11/05/2000 - Steve Corino defeated Jerry Lynn, Justin Credible and the Sandman in an elimination tournament for the ECW Heavyweight title
11/05/2001 - Test defeated Edge for the WWF Intercontinental title
11/05/2001 - The Rock defeated Chris Jericho for the WCW Heavyweight title
11/05/2002 - Edge & Rey Misterio, Jr. defeated Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit for the WWE Smackdown Tag Team title
11/05/2003 - Nigel McGuinness defeated Hoss for the Heartland Wrestling Association European Title
11/06/1977 - Dick Murdoch wins his 4th Mid-South North American Championship by defeating Jerry Oates in Shreveport, LA.
11/06/1983 - Jake Roberts defeated Ron Garvin to win the NWA National TV Title in Atlanta, GA.
11/06/1988 - Tommy Ferrera defeats Matt Derringer to win the PWA Iron Horse TV Title in Minneapolis, MN
11/06/1989 - Jerry Lawler defeated the Soultaker for the USWA Unified Heavyweight title
11/06/1990 - Jeff Jarrett & Cody Michaels defeated Doug Gilbert & Tony Anthony for the USWA Tag Team title
11/06/1990 - Koji Kanemoto and Hiroyoshi Tenzan of New Japan Pro Wrestling make their pro debuts in a 22-man battle royal.
11/06/1994 - Event - When Worlds Collide, LA Sports Arena, Los Angeles, CA
11/06/1995 - Ahmed Johnson defeated Jerry Lawler for the USWA Unified Heavyweight title
11/06/1997 - Tom Brandi defeated Jimmy Cicero in a tournament final for the IPWA Heavyweight title
11/06/1998 - The Dudley Boys defeated Masato Tanaka & Balls Mahoney for the ECW Tag title
11/06/2000 - Bull Buchanan & the Goodfather defeated the Hardy Boyz for the WWF Tag Team title
11/06/2000 - Crowbar defeated Reno for the WCW Hardcore title
11/06/2002 - Jerry Lynn defeated AJ Stylas for the NWA-TNA X title
11/06/2002 - The Damaja defeated Nova for the Ohio Valley Heavyweight title
11/07/1901 - Tom Jenkins defeated Dan McLeod for the American Heavyweight title
11/07/1979 - Harley Race defeated Shohei Baba for the NWA Heavyweight Wrestling title
11/07/1982 - Paul Orndorff defeated Masked Superstar for the Georgia National Heavyweight title
11/07/1985 - Event - Wrestling Classic, Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, IL
11/07/2000 - The WWF agreed to pay $18 million to the Hart family as settlement of the Owen Hart wrongful death suit
11/07/2001 - Jason Lee & Derrick King defeated Shelton Benjamin & Brock Lesnar for the Ohio Valley Southern Heavyweight Tag Title
11/08/1975 - Nick Bockwinkel defeated Verne Gagne for the AWA Heavyweight title
11/08/1975 - Tony Parisi & Louis Cerdan defeated Blackjack Lanza & Blackjack Mulligan for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/08/1980 - Tony Garea & Rick Martel defeated The Samoans for the WWWF Tag Team title
11/08/1993 - Brian christopher & Jeff Jarrett defeated Rex Hargrove & Koko B. Ware for the USWA Tag Team title
11/08/1999 - The New Age Outlaws defeated Mankind & Al Snow for the WWF Tag Team title
11/08/1999 - Scott Hall defeated Bret Hart, Sid Vicious & Goldberg for the WCW US Heavyweight title
11/08/2003 - Jerry Lawler defeated Al Snow for the Jersey All Pro Heavyweight Title
11/09/1956 - Lou Thesz defeated Whipper Billy Watson for the NWA Heavyweight Wrestling title
11/09/1986 - One Man Gang defeated Terry Gordy by forfeit for the UWF Heavyweight title
11/09/1991 - Eric Embry defeated Tom Prichard for the USWA Southern Heavyweight title
11/09/1996 - The Bruise Brothers defeated Brian Christopher & Wolfie D for the USWA Tag Team title
11/09/1997 - Event - Survivor Series, Molson Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
11/09/1997 - Shawn Michaels defeated Bret Hart for the WWF Heavyweight title
11/09/1997 - Earl Hebner, under orders from Vince McMahon, declared that Bret Hart submitted to Shawn Michaels, when he did not
11/09/1997 - Steve Austin defeated Owen Hart for the WWF Intercontinental title
11/09/1999 - Event - November to Remember, Bert Flickenger Center, Buffalo, NY
11/09/2000 - WWFE filed suit against the Parents Television Council for harassment
11/09/2002 - Chet Jablonski defeated Matt Stryker for the Heartland Wrestling Association Heavyweight Title