You can either drink space beer, or pour it on your burning apartment...

Space beer? Kind of. Mentioned around the Internet, the beer was made from barley grown on the International Space Station in 2006, so it's actually a terrestrial brew, although I suppose you could argue it was made from "space-age" materials. My first thought on reading this was "well, they need something to wash the taste of recycled urine from their mouths, so more power to them," so you could imagine my disappointment for the crew on the ISS when it was revealed the beer, a joint effort of the Russian Academy of Science, Japanese brewer Sapporo, and a Japanese university, was concocted here on Earth. I mean, come on, you guys built a space station, and you can't even sneak some spare parts up there to make a still?

While I find great fun on my talk show of poking fun at the United Kingdom, notably Britain, for some of the incredibly stupid things they do, usually under the more-than-watchful gaze of the government, sometimes stories slip through the cracks on me, and I have to play catch-up. The town of Bournemouth, back in March of this year, took the extraordinary step of banning fire extinguishers from apartment complexes, calling them a safety hazard. But of course.

This move has created a square dance of sorts between several government agencies in Britain, as first, Dorset Fire and Rescue defended the idea, saying new building regulations mean every escape route should be completely fireproof. Oh, really? Well then, riddle me this, dumbass firefighters...if the escape routes are supposed to be completely fireproof, then how come the entire fucking building cannot be completely fireproof. Oh, that's right, then you'd be out of a job. Not to mention, what the hell is Dorset Fire and Rescue so freakin worried about? Last time I checked, they get paid no matter what they do, and it's not like someone putting out a kitchen fire gets paid for the effort.

The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents backed the move as well, using the "different types of extinguishers for different types of fires" argument, apparently having never heard of fucking ABC extinguishers. Then again, with the number of security cameras proliferating across England, it kind of makes sense when you think about it, as after all, government officials should know about the fire before even the people in the apartment complex do.

Stepping above the fray, the Department for Communities and Local Government said this was not going to result in the removal of fire extinguishers, saying that "fire and safety regulations make clear that appropriate safety be provided." Well, at least somebody is thinking with the north end of their bodies, although I guess the case could be made that if their asses were on fire and their heads were catching, there would still be a debate of some sort...