Probably Uncalled For Episode 47 Wrap-up

So, according to the Migration Policy Institute, Los Angeles is on the verge of becoming a "Third World city," is it? Hmmm. That actually kind of makes sense in a lot of ways. Many Third World countries have booming movie industries, thriving sex trades, and rampant, bizarre celebrity worship. You know...people like Michael Jackson. Yes, sir...that sounds an awful lot like Los Angeles, and as a bonus, L.A. is bigger than a lot of Third World countries, so if anything..."honorary" status?...

Said it on the show, and it bears repeating here in print- Royal Caribbean International, and its Chief Executive, Adam Goldstein, are douchebags of the highest caliber. Stranding a family of five in a foreign country with no passports, and in just their fucking pajamas, because their 7-month-old daughter had a cold? Adam Goldstein, the ship's so-called captain, and the ship's so-called doctor oughta to be made to take a round-trip from Miami to Havana and back in their pajamas on a fucking raft.

If you should happen to agree with us, and want to share your displeasure:

Royal Caribbean International

attn: extreme douchebag Adam Goldstein

1050 Caribbean Way

Miami, Florida 33132-2096

non-media-related question line - Corporate HQ - (305) 539-6000

or you can email Lyan Sierra-Caro - Acct Exec., Corporate Communications

lsierracaro@rccl.com

Send pictures of letters, envelopes, or emails addressed to "extreme douchebag" Adam Goldstein, and we'll post them here on ProbablyUncalledFor.com in a follow-up post.

There is simply no defensible reason at all...ever...period...for not even having enough food to feed our troops in Iraq. For all the dozens...maybe hundreds...likely thousands of reasons this bullshit quagmire is probably set to stay for another twenty years, this one is particularly shameful. I'm not sure I'd rather commit suicide than starve to death, and hopefully, I'll never get the chance to find out, even in the name of whatever the hell the Bush administration wants to spin as "patriotism" this week. War is hell, and especially so when the devil in the detail is the jerk-off solely responsible for getting us into this hot mess in the first fucking place.

When it comes down to Red Bull or Mamajuana Energy, WWE wrestler John "Bradshaw" Layfield's energy drink product, I'm going to have to go with JBL on this one. Not that I do not enjoy a Red Bull and Jack from time to time, but I hold firm to a body count principle, and right now, Red Bull is far enough in the lead (and Mamajuana Energy has no trial of dead leading to their doors) to make it hard not to declare Layfield the winner here.

Japanese whiskey? The best in the world? I'm going to remain skeptical for the time being...I do wonder, however, if all the flags in Scotland flew at half-mast when the awards were announced. At any rate, kudos to Suntory Hibiki, Yoichi chief blender Tetsuyi Hisamitsu for their Yoichi 20 years old, the best whiskey in the world.

Phone rape? Shut the fuck up with that noise? If I talk someone over the phone into giving themselves a black eye, am I guilty of assault? Hardly. Must be a great and ponderous dumbass population in Tunisia. For fuck's sake, never even knew Tunisia had a cell phone tower...

What do you get the guy who has it all? How about a brass-knuckled bagslap if he spends $300,000 on a watch that simply tells him whether or not it is day or night? Magnificently needless extravagance, something the geniuses at Romain Jerome should be proud of.

Remember everybody, starting Wednesday, May 21, 2008, Probably Uncalled For will being airing at its new night and time - Wednesdays 8pm Eastern/5pm Pacific! Back in Prime Time, baby!!!